Josh Burbank Speaks At Scott Childers' Funeral
Horsehockey V - Episode 472
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Josh stands behind the podium. "Scott." he says, in a near-whisper. "What can I say about him? He smelled bad and like to pour milk down his pants. Wait, no that was me. Wait, we both dide. Dear god, what manner of people are we? Anywho, Scott once punched a giraffe in the nuts. He was like that. Always punching things. So insane. Sara? Where are you Sara? Oh god, I love you Sara Hewitt. I didn't mean to set Jasper on fire, besides, he was okay wasn't he? Just nightmares. Come back to me, Sara. Scott had a horrible fear of Ed MacMahon, which was justified because Ed once had him evicted out of his childhood home, the Cookie Roberts Orphanage on Central Park West. Scott once slept with a girl named Pamela Anderson but not the Pamela Anderson. I had a year long affair with Adrianna Bearbgu, a Czech girl who was rich as anything. Scott spoiled it for me by urinating on her front porch every night for a month. I don't know how he got past her ever- increasing security but it was enough to drive her mad and the last I heard of her, she had to take three pills just to get to sleep without crying. So in conclusion, go to Hell, Scott, I hope you die and no, it wasn't kosher when you deep fried the Thanksgiving turkey in my hall closet and burnt half my Conan novels. You suck and I'm glad you are dead. I will poop on your grave."
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Lord Reaibn Daenorth (credit to Lots)
6/6/2019 11:44:19 PM
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