Semi-Multicoloured Caucasian

Horsehockey V - Episode 599

The destruction of "Connor Conn", the poorly executed alter ego slash high school stereotype of Connor Perry Wilcox, began almost immediately upon the Wilcoxes checking into a Glasgow hotel the night before their scheduled flight back to Indianapolis via Chicago was set to take off. Connor's folks, Paul and Cathy, had reserved a luxury suite for the three of them, although they didn't exactly agree that Connor deserved such a treat. Still, they did this despite the cost of having to book a very last-second flight to England after finding out that Connor had taken money from them and flown there himself without telling anybody. Besides, keeping Connor in the suite meant it would be much easier to keep an eye on him, making sure he doesn't try to sneak off.

Connor is puzzled at the set of new clothes that he has found left on his bed. Before he can say anything, his parents enter the room. Paul is carrying a garbage bag, while Cathy holds a large jewelry box in her hands.

"Young man, we mentioned that this gangbanger persona you developed was going to stop when we were riding over here," Paul says, looking down on his only son. "We've decided that it's going to start right here. We want you to take those stupid clothes off and put them in this bag. After that, you are to put on those clothes that are lying in your bed. We've spent far too much money coming here to take you back home, Connor, and that includes the money buying you those clothes, so we do not want to hear any of your objections. None."

Connor examines the clothes on the bed: khaki slacks, a navy blue button shirt with a black sweater vest ensemble, black socks, and black dress shoes. This is a far cry from what he's wearing now, and the clothing on the bed is something he only associates with his schoolmates that he considers "dorky" or even "preppy". In Connor's mind, he is neither, regardless of what 97 percent of his classmates have thought of him since kindergarten.

"Dad! These clothes are gay!" Connor whines.
"WHAT DID I JUST SAY, SON?!" Paul erupts. "I said you were not to complain! If you say just one more word, so help me, I will put your goddamn lights out! I've had it! Put the damn clothes on!"

On the brink of tears, Connor sheds his football jersey, his baggy jeans and shoes. Cathy takes the various "bling" from his neck and fingers, storing them in the box she brought into the room. Paul takes it upon himself to put Connor's discarded "gangsta wear" into the garbage bag, where it will later meet its final resting place in the bottom of the hotel's dumpster. Quickly putting on the new clothes, Connor is deeply embarrassed. This outfit is so not him. On the other hand, the slow realization that his parents were right, and that Connor Wilcox truly is a desperate poseur trying too hard to be cool or be liked, is slowly starting to set in.

As Paul leaves the suite to make the trip to the dumpster, Cathy leads her son to a chair in the living room. "Connor, just sit here for a while. Don't move. We can't trust you anymore, so your dad and I need to keep you in our sight so you don't run off and pull any more stunts like this!"
"Mom, I'm eighteen!"
"Yes, and? You proved you can't be trusted by stealing our money and flying to Scotland without permission! What's more, you have no reason at all to be here! Don't you understand how angry we are? Your dad and I had to take time off from both of our jobs, which we could very well lose for having to do this at the last second? Connor, do you want your dad and I to get fired?! Are you even paying attention to how bad the economy is today?"
"What does that have to do with anything?!" Connor demanded, his voice rising up into that high pitched tone he despised so much.
"That's enough, young man! SIT DOWN. Oh, and this is not over by a longshot, Connor. When we all get home tomorrow, you're in so much deep trouble. I don't even think you have any idea just how much!"
"You're trying to change me! I don't want that!"
"Change you? Your father and I can't stand the way you've been acting for the past two years. It isn't how we raised you. Eighteen years old or not, we're still your parents, and as long as you still live under our roof, you're going to follow our rules. That means no more acting like a rapper. And before we came here to get you, your dad and I saved you the trouble of throwing out the rest of those clothes and CDs you've been getting. Clean break, son! It's time for a new Connor Wilcox!"

As Cathy strides into the master bedroom, Connor sits in that chair, wearing clothes he positively hates, and feeling angry and confused at the same time. "I'm an adult! I'm being myself!" were the two thoughts he kept coming back to...even if the voice in the back of his mind kept saying that he'd been living three major lies since middle school, and someone with more sense than Connor finally had to step up and say it.

  1. Connor's life gets harder once the family makes it home.
  2. Connor rushes out of the suite. Destination? Anywhere's better than here.

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Lord Reaibn Daenorth (credit to Ben McClellan)

6/7/2019 2:08:30 AM

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