From a Wake, to the Void, to the Fens of Canmoor, to the Kingdom of Night's Grace

Our main characters are the warrior Princess Astra from Aqualaria, Princess Exotica from Allaria, the wizard and necromancer Belboz, and Josh Burbank, known as the Chaos-bringer. The first three originated in another addventure called the Never Ending Quest. They come from an alternative reality with more than a slight flavour of Game of Thrones, though we were there first! (Though with less sex and violence than GoT.) Josh is notionally from our own Earth, though whether he truly originated there seems doubtful.

It all began with Reaibn's funeral, being held somewhere in Scotland. Things rapidly go downhill, and before long the wake turns into something of a drunken orgy. Those attending the funeral include the Princesses Astra and Exotica, stranded in our own reality, who become drunk enough to decide that stripping down to their underwear and mud-wrestling one other would be a good idea. Their contest naturally attracts a good deal of interest from the others at the party. An attempt by the Story Cops to close down the thread is thwarted. (Hooray!)

Meanwhile, in another reality, Exotica's mother, Queen Sovay, worried that her daughter is missing, turns to the exiled former court wizard and necromancer Belboz for help. Using a crystal ball he locates Exotica in another reality which he says is known as Earth, and shows her horrified mother the mud-wrestling bout. King Emry enters, and Belboz tells him and his wife that, as well as Exotica, all the Allarian heroes who have recently mysteriously gone missing are stranded on Earth. Sovay says that she and Belboz must go there and attempt to bring them all back home. However rescuing Exotica must be their top priority. Thanks to Belboz's magic, he and Sovay successfully arrive at the party. The startled Astra and Exotica stop fighting. Exotica is sufficiently drunk that she is totally unapologetic.

Matters are made worse when Josh Burbank sneaks up behind Sovay and pushes her face-first into the mud, which the two princesses find very funny. Sovay is furious, and demands that Belboz deal with Josh. However Josh's reputation has somehow reached Allaria, and Belboz knows that he can do him no real harm, especially since away from Allaria his (Belboz's) magic won't work the same way. Then Josh pushes Belboz into the mud. Astra slips over and lands on top of the wizard. Meanwhile since Exotica, like Astra, is almost completely covered in mud, it is only now that she realises that at some point during the fight her bra has come off.

Belboz manages to get to his feet. Furious, he attempts to turn Josh into a toad, temporarily forgetting that for some reason his magic functions unpredictably on Earth. All that appears to happen is that Josh finds himself holding a vinyl record.

But, unrealised for a moment, there has been a very serious side-effect. Queen Sovay is dead! Belboz tells Exotica that they should promptly return to Allaria where, as a necromancer, he will be able to reanimate her mother, if not exactly restore her to life. Luckily there is a - still fairly sober - first-aider at the party and also a defibrillator on the premises, and Sovay is restored to life. The first-aider says she needs to be taken to hospital by ambulance, but Belboz believes that her best chance of a full recovery will be if he takes her back to Allaria. Accordingly he grabs her hand and teleports the pair of them, in his haste leaving Exotica and Astra behind.

Astra and Exotica, sobered up by what has happened, had intended to get cleaned up and get dressed. However Josh Burbank, not known as the Chaosbringer for nothing, somehow talks them into shotgunning three cans of beer apiece, and both princesses, now completely nude and giggling, stumble back into the mud for more wrestling. The reason why three cans of beer have had such a big and rapid effect is that Josh had covertly added a shot of vodka to each one.

One of the princesses (later revealed to be Exotica) appears to pass out, and is lying face down in the mud. But it's a trick to lure Josh into the mud. The girls bring him down, jump on him, and start tearing off his clothes, Eventually Josh manages to throw off Astra and Exotica and get to his knees, by now wearing only his underpants and his socks and fully as muddy as Astra and Exotica. But then Astra kicks him in the groin, and he howls in agony.

Meanwhile Belboz has returned to Allaria with Queen Sovay. In the main court of the castle, Belboz carries the dying and mud-caked queen to a horrified King Emry, who has been joined by the mysterious hermit Simon the Anchorite (see NEQ 7137]). (The recent events that have shaken the kingdom have prompted the hermit, who has spent many years living by himself, to return to Allaria's capital city of Caemlyn. Simon can sense that Princess Astra is missing, and he has sought out King Emry to offer any kind of help he can give.) Belboz says that he will kill Josh, whom he blames for everything that has happened. Gently setting the dying Sovay on an unused table in the center of the hall, Belboz quickly conjures up a magical spell that will work properly now that he has returned to his homeland. The great room is flooded with a blinding light... and Queen Sovay sits upright on the table, coughing, gasping for air, and very much alive. But the Earth mud brought back with Sovay contains a small but deadly parasite, and some of the guards have touched the mud. Earthlings have long been immune to this parasite, but an Allarian with no prior exposure to the soil will be infected by the virus. This means that Belboz and Queen Sovay, who were previously pushed into the mud by Josh Burbank back on Earth, are immune. The same will go for the princesses Astra and Exotica whenever they return to Allaria, as well as those who are still missing and lost somewhere on Earth. The parasite slowly infects a person. A victim can go from feeling normal to being bedridden and too weak to even move over the course of a couple of months. The virus is highly contagious. Not only are all of the guards in grave danger, but so are King Emry and Simon the Anchorite.

Belboz returns to Earth to bring back the princesses. He is surprised to see that they are mud-wrestling again and that Josh now appears to have joined in. The three wrestlers seem to be too caught up in their fight to aware of his presence. Since it is only possible for Belboz to teleport someone when he is touching them, he reluctantly ventures back into the mud a second time. Dodging flailing arms and legs, he manages to touch both princesses and begins the necessary brief incantation to teleport the three of them.

Unfortunately Josh's chaos energy interferes with the spell, and they they are not teleported to Allaria. Instead Belboz, Astra, Exotica, and Josh too, find themselves in the middle of a featureless void, an expanse of white space. They feel no ground underfoot, but can stand well enough. Belboz grabs Astra and Exotica and recites his incantation again, but nothing happens. As Josh wanders away to search for a portal out of the void, Belboz explains that Sovay is now back home and is fully recovered, and that he came back to rescue the princesses but that Josh's presence interfered with his spell. He admits that he does not know where they are now. Also when he tried to teleport them home nothing happened. Either magic doesn't work here, or they need to get further away from Josh. He hopes that it is the latter.

Josh returns to the other three, now fully dressed and without a speck of mud on him. He has overheard Belbox threaten to kill him, and he is not impressed. He points out that he is the chaos-bringer. He adds: "You would be wise to think before speaking. You are far from home. How your powers got temporarily enhanced enough to translocate between variance and floor I have no idea, but my name is known throughout the Tower, and in a void such as this I become the essence of my nature. Powers in boardrooms tremble at my name, and you think you can execute me?!" Exotica interposes herself between Josh and Belboz. She notices that they are all now fully clothed (even Astra!) in what would be business casual attire in 21st century America. Josh reaches past Exotica and touches Belboz's shoulder. Belboz feels a particularly odd chill sensation spread throughout his whole body, and then vanish. "There you go, Belboz," says Josh with a sneer. "Enjoy mortal life. And good luck finding your way out of here without my help. Ladies, come with me or grow old in this void." Josh walks away, without a look back. Although Belboz had been unable to cast his spell to transport between worlds in this void, he had still felt his magical power. But now the power that had flowed through his veins was gone, like he has been unplugged from the source. What had the chaos-bringer done?!

Astra and Exotica follow Josh as he heads across the void, since he appears to be their only hope of getting out of there. Belboz isn't a fool. It seems to him all too likely that, if he remains bereft of his magic, he will be trapped in the void for all eternity. So he swallows his pride, and hurries after the others. "Will you be able to take us back to our own reality?" Exotica asks Josh.

"I have no control over where the portal will lead to," says Josh. "They don't call me the chaos-bringer for nothing." Belboz mutters to himself. Josh claims to have no control, yet he cut off Belboz's magic like he was shutting off a light switch. For the moment, however, he decides to hold his tongue. "Ugh," says Josh, looking at Astra and Exotica. "This will never do." He waves his hand, and they are both starkers again. "Much better. And don't interrupt me. I am seeking for a portal!"

Exotica, Astra and Belboz haven't been following Josh across the void for long before - thanks to all the booze they have drunk - both women feel a desperate need to pee. Josh refuses to magic up a privy or a tree for them to go behind, claiming that he needs to save all his concentration for finding a portal. He and Belboz do turn their backs, however, and the ladies do their business. When the urine touches the invisible surface on which they are standing, it promptly vanishes. Belboz manages to persuade Josh to restore his magic, so that he can help search for a portal. Belboz actually has more knowledge than Josh realises about this place and what is going on. However, he has no intention of revealing that information to Josh just yet. Astra and Exotica fall a little behind the other two, and Exotica whispers that she doesn't believe they are truly trapped here. She thinks Josh is just pulling their chains and having a bit of sport. About twenty minutes later Josh finds a portal and offers for the ladies to go first. Josh says he has no way of knowing where the portal will lead but, with some trepidation on Exotica's part, the two ptincesses do go through, followed by the others.

With a strange and unfamiliar wrenching feeling that shakes them to the marrow, Exotica, Astra, Josh, and Belboz find themselves cast into deep, sucking mud. They are in the middle of a swamp. Towering above them are trees, immense and overgrown with vines. Some are bigger around than a small cottage. Their large roots reach out into the fen they are standing in, forming strange shapes, like cages, ribs, and far more chilling things. Moss the color of an old hag's mane adorns them. The fen beneath them is the color of things gone, things dead. It is a sickening grey, and occasionally unsavory things and worse bubble up from the choking mud. (Largely based on The Traveler's NEQ 237)

Astra recognises the place. She has been here before. It is the fens of Canmoor. She asks Josh if he can find a portal to help them escape. He says that it's much harder to do that here than in the void. And even if he was lucky and saw one not too far away. how could they reach it? (He does not mention that - now he is no longer in the Void - his powers have declined and before long he will be reduced to his usual level of idiocy.) Just then something bites Astra's butt. She reaches under the mud. A moment later her hand comes up clasping a small, tailed, four-limbed, amphibian creature. (NEQ 2927) Luckily its teeth, though sharp, are too small to have done any real damage. Using some of her memories from before, Astra manages to assist the others to relatively solid ground. "We are somewhere within the Fens of Canmoor," she says, prompting a string of profanity from Belboz.

Covered in foul-smelling mud, they make their way carefully through the swamp, trying to keep to the more solid areas where the trees grew. Dusk falls with them still struggling through the swamp. By now they are tired, hungry and thirsty, for the water of the fens is not safe to drink. "We will have to stop for the night," Astra says. (She is the de facto leader, being the only one with much in the way of survival skills.) "Screw this, I am risking some magic to get myse-- I mean us out of here." says Belboz. He is fully aware that using powerful magic soon after travelling through a portal is pretty risky. However, these fens stink of wild magic and he realises that a random portal could appear at any moment. If possible, before that can happen he wants to use his magic to teleport them back to his caves. Failing that, he is perfectly happy to just teleport himself. Meanwhile Astra and Exotica fall to bickering with Josh. "Silence, you fools!" exclaims Belboz. "I am ready to cast my spell!" Taking a bit of chalk he draws a few rudimentary symbols on the ground, then stands in a small circle he has drawn. While Belboz is chanting (the spell requires a verbal component), the entire group find themselves falling through the ground and into a bedroom.

Belboz, Josh, Astra, Exotica, and several hundred gallons of liquid mud all land on an ornate four-poster bed. The bed at least breaks their fall, before it collapses under the impact immediately afterwards. This had clearly once been an opulent room before the swamp mud covered the floor and splashed over most of the walls. (Based on NEQ 23548) The four have no idea of where - or even when - they are. Into the room bursts an angry young man, who is stunned by the devastation. (NEQ 37858) When he gets over the shock he asks: "Who are you, and what are you doing in my bedroom?" His hand moves to the hilt of his sword, and he is standing where he can block their exit from the room. (NEQ 37860) None of our heroes has a weapon, and it is unlikely that Belboz could cast a spell in time.

Belboz claims to be Zobleb, a humble magician, who was doing some magical experiments with his friends when they were all sucked into a portal. He goes on: "Now, if you could let us clean up and provide us some transporation, we would be happy to be on our way. The kingdom of Allaria would..." But the man interrupts him, saying that there is no such kingdom as Allaria. Belboz falters, realising that they must be very far from home, and asks where they are. "The Grand Kingdom of Night's Grace," says the man. "Protocol dictates I take you before a Nira so she can decide what to do with you. Follow me, and don't try anything." Then he adds: "No, on second thoughts you'd better precede me, so that I can keep an eye on you." He refuses Exotica's request that first they be allowed to bathe and be provided with clothes, saying: "Since your presence here is unauthorised, you must all be taken before a Nira without delay. Move!" Astra considers jumping him, but reluctantly decides that it would be too risky now that he has his sword in his hand. Belboz regretts that, having just cast one draining teleportation spell, it will be some time before he could cast another. Not that the young man would be likely to give him enough time to finish the incantation, in any case. As the group files out of the room, with the youth at the rear, Belboz says: "None of us is familiar with your kingdom or its customs. Perhaps you could tell us what a Nira is?"

The man chuckles, replying "Well, if you are truly from another world then you do not know of the Nira. They give our leaders the wisdom of True Darkness, but in matters of magic they have sole jurisdiction. We call them she and her, but they truly have no gender. They just are..."

"Turn left!" he continues. "Through that door is Nira Laendra, First Proventiate of the County of Varos." They have arrived at a break in the hall. Ahead the hall continues on to what appears to be a spiral staircase. To the right the hall goes on, with a few doors on each side. On the left is an ornate door of varnished wood, decorated with symbols that Belboz does not recognize. All of our band of travelers at this point are contemplating escape plans. As they consider these things, a hooded creature behind the door, standing by a table prepared with fruits and breads and other foodstuffs, wearing a dark robe, with no face and only dark purple pinpricks of light for eyes, smiles invisibly to itself. "Good," the Nira says softly, "I like games." The hands and feet of the creature are covered by gray leather gloves and boots, and a unicursal hexagram made of some dark metal hangs on a leather cord around its neck. Wait, the Nira can read minds?!

Very little is known about the Nira:

1. The Nira are highly magical beings that only partially exist in the Prime Material. This makes them extremely difficult to kill without magical means. Are they immortal? Who knows.

2. The Nira can read strong thoughts and perceive strong intent and strong feelings, but only in relatively close proximity.

3. The Nira are referred to as she or her or he or him by most people, but they appear to truly have no gender. What are they? Where do they come from? How do they reproduce (do they reproduce)? None of these questions have answers... yet.

A voice from behind the closed door in front of the party says "Enter". It is quite a deep voice, but it is hard to tell whether it is that of a male or a female. It is also a strangely compelling voice, one that it would take quite an effort of will to defy. The young man steps forward and pushes the door open, and then gestures for the others to go through. One or two hesitate for a moment, but they all walk into the room, the young man reverting to his position at the rear and thus the last to enter. Once he is inside he bows respectfully to the Nira. "Greetings, Nira," he says. "I apprehended these people, who materialised in my chambers, and have brought them for your judgement." "Thank you, Ness," the robed and hooded figure standing by the table says. She turns back towards the other four. "I am Nira Laendra, First Proventiate of the County of Varos. You were not authorised to enter our land. I shall decide on your fate."

"We are a party who arrived in your land by accident," Astra says, feeling that some response to what the Nira had said was called for. She then gives the names of herself and her companions. "Almost a stereotypical set of adventurers, one might say, albeit rather overloaded with princesses," Laendra says, sounding slightly amused. "A warrior, a magic user and a rogue." How does she know so much about them? The Nira goes on: "But what about you, Exotica? What could you possibly bring to the group, other than being decorative?"

1. She's needling you to see how you will respond, Astra thinks. Don't rise to the bait.

Add New Option

Go Back

View Forward Story Tree
View Back Story Tree