Sing the Praises of Pants

You've known Pants for years, and you already know her greatest attribute: the way she looks in a pair of pants. Jeans, capris, yoga pants, you name it, she can rock it.

Today is no different, and in the duress you find yourself in, you suddenly don't find it inappropriate to proposition Ms. McGee. She is single, after all, she's your age, and you could swear that she digs you, too.

1. Actually no, you don't make a fool of yourself.
2. She agrees for a quickie in the nearest empty room.
3. You fumble badly and offer her ten dollars to buy her pants.

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